Does working in a family or couple office work able to work outside clerical job?

Does working in a family or couple office work able to work outside clerical job?

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when I was only 18 years old, when I had just started in working on my first part-time job , when I met you - when you were 27

You do Not have any outstanding looks but you are hardworking enough and motivated enough for me to drive in and out every where

You do not like that I know and meet boys

You do not allow me to wear short skirts

Gym can only be done in the clubhouse downstairs

You have those perverted fetishes. Even if I do not enjoy it, I will give it all to you

I understood then that my boyfriend was insecure for fear of me being snatched away

Last year i started talking very seriously about getting married together with him 

We had even Go to the property viewing for decoration

But six months ago I first found out my boyfriend was cheating on me

I collapsed at that moment and I cried like crazy for a week

Then he kept reconcile with me saying he was just playful that he would change

I choose to forgive him because I do not  want to lose all things in six years also because I still love him

Until last week his laptop and his own  WhatsApp did not log out

I just instinctively glanced on his laptop on his WhatsApp screen and then my whole body was so painful that I could not stop cry

Not a couple of ambiguous sentences it is even a very complete conversation with all the emojis like boyfriend and girlfriend

It turns out that the last six months I thought I was tinkering with was just a cover-up for your more wantonness

What hurts me the most is not who he is with

Yes I think back

He may have just finished kissing someone and he may have just finished hugging someone

Then he Turned back home and he kissed me and he cheated on me again with the same dirty gutter mouth

My moment was not as simple as sadness

It Is I was feeling stupid

And I felt dirty and it is really disgusting

Does anyone understand that feeling?

Many people ask me about my current situation

Since last week I have moved back in my parents home with my mom

From living together for 6 years - with cars in and out with workers - is considered a carefree day

Coming back the bed sheets were (from when I was 18 years old actually) really unusual

The only thing I am really grateful for is having my mom to take care of me

Looking at the three unpacked luggage I realized that for the last 6 years I removed a pile of old clothes and a body of bruises I took nothing away

For 6 years I have been helping my boyfriend family company with some admin stuff

I still remember my boyfriend saying: The world outside is dangerous. You might as well come directly to my house to help. We can see each other every day

At that time I thought it was very sweet now I know thinking back really cut off my back

I really regret why I believed this statement was a promise

I found myself like nothing but this failed relationship

No impressive cv

no great job skillset

my boyfriend called last night. He was still crying and he said: if You, a girl, go outside, you can not stand for long come. Come back

I was really hesitant after hearing that but I chose to cut him off immediately rationally told me I would be soft-hearted if I continued to talk to him

I know I sound annoying. Please wake up

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You are not stupid, you are still in love with him, so you choose to trust him.

It's not that you are stupid, it is that he does not even deserve your love.

You were 18 when you start to followed him, he was 27, he was 9 yrs older than you,

He was supposed to show you the world, but he chose to trap you.

His insecurities, his control, and even his fetishes,

The most precious six years of your youth,

You use it to get on with him, to be understanding of him, to think he is just insecure.

You paid your entire youth to protect a man’s inferiority.

What about the result? What does he reward you with? It is with you kissing his mouth, turning to kiss the second one.

The pain is not just betrayal, it is the fact that he has stomped your six years of tolerance, understanding, and giving to the ground, and is hugging you and asking you “what is for tonight” like nothing happened.

It is normal to have nausea just thinking about it, it is normal to feel dirty,

Because you had truly loved, and he used it as a backdrop for his cheating.

You are not lost for six years, you have  spent six years seeing a person clearly and then being able to walk away from this bad relationship with the bruises but no baggage again. He will never change, people who are greedy to play can not go back, his "security" is never to be afraid of you leaving, but to make sure he always has a backup.

After crying , you have to know that you are no longer the 18-year-old girl who gives up everything, you are a grown-up girl, you have the right to choose someone who does not have you wronged, does not make you nauseous, and sincerely treats you as a treasure.

But of course , This person is certainly not him.