When I first got a roommate, I thought it would be peaceful — like brotherhood, bonding, and maybe some motivational quotes here and there.
Instead, I got Big Brother Naija in real life.
Episode 1:
He boiled indomie… with toothpaste. I don’t know what science project he was trying to attempt, but I ran. I legit started Googling, “Can you die from inhaling mint steam?”
Episode 4:
He borrowed my towel. I saw it later being used… to clean his shoes. His reason? “Bro, I no fit find rag.”
I cried.
Episode 7:
He played loud music at 2 a.m. — not regular music oh. Na Duncan Mighty full volume, like we were in a village festival. When I complained, he said:
“Omo, na inspiration I dey find.”
From who? Amadioha?
Bonus Episode:
He brought a goat into the room once. Yes, a real goat. Said his “uncle in the village” sent it to him. The goat slept on my mat. Till today, I hear bleating in my dreams.
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Why I Can’t Leave
Do I want to move out? Yes.
Can I afford to? No.
So I sit and endure like a loyal Nollywood housewife.
But one day… one day, I’ll have my revenge. I’ll hide his charger during an exam week.
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Moral of the Story:
Choose your roommates wisely. Or at least, pray before JAMB gives you one.
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Tags:
#FunnyRoommate #StudentLife #BrokeAndBold #Relatable #NollywoodRealities
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