Just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean you're on the same page with your partner. At different times, we all want different things, and this can clash with our relationships. You may be able to relax, but he can't, which sometimes occurs.
It can be both frustrating and painful to remain in a relationship in which the level of comfort has diminished. Communication with a partner is vitally important; without communication, the relationship itself dies.
It's never a good idea to waste your time on someone who isn't willing to commit. How do you know if that's the case, though? There's a saying that states, 'It is never advisable to recycle time,' and that is definitely true. 
I agree; no one desires to enter into a dead-end relationship. Most of us want that true, genuine, lasting love, and our desire for it may lead us to remain in situations that are the opposite of what we want. Why is this occurring? Instead of looking at what is, we are too engrossed in what might be.
You should seize the opportunity to date this man, because he is checking off way too many boxes for you. You rarely experience this level of chemistry, so you would be foolish to let it slip away! Although he doesn't seem to be on the same page as you, you may be able to convince him with a bit of effort.
Possibly, if he is aware of how excellent you are, he may step up and be the man you want him to be. Alternatively, if you can help him get over his broken heart, if you can just wait a little longer, or if you can help him in some other way, he may be the man you want him to be.
I have deluded myself in this manner many times, and I have observed others doing the same. Therefore, I can tell you from experience that this approach never succeeds.
Don't be distracted by what may happen in the future; look at the current situation and decide what you want to do. These are the main signs that you are wasting your time with him in order to get there, and that he won't commit to you. He doesn't want to be in a relationship, so believe him if a man says he doesn't want to be in a relationship! 
It doesn't matter what his motives might be, the important thing is that the facts speak for themselves. He may be telling you that he does not want to be in a relationship with you. It may also be the case that, at this moment, he does not want to be in a relationship with anyone. He may wish to focus on his job, he may not be emotionally prepared for a commitment, he may want to be single and free, or he may have some very good reasons for doing what he does. It doesn't matter if he has feelings for you, either. If he doesn't want to be with you, it doesn't change anything.
In particular, men usually express their emotions through actions rather than words. It's not that he will outright tell you, 'I don't want to be in a serious relationship with you,' but his behaviour will demonstrate that he doesn't care. Flirting with other women in front of you is one method of making your point loud and clear. 
I've made the blunder in the past of thinking that he's attempting to make me jealous because he adores me so much (or at least that has been my delusion!). What's more likely is that he demonstrates and affirms that he's a liberated man who can act as he pleases. 
He's dreaming about the future and you're not included...
It's possible that he's dreaming about how he wants to live in Europe for a couple of years, or how he wants to move out and switch jobs, or escape the city and live a rural life.
It's all fine and dandy, but it doesn't seem to account for you in either of these proposals, it doesn't even solicit your thoughts on whether or not you prefer cities or suburbs, and it doesn't seem to care whether or not you would be there for him in the future.
When a man is really invested in a woman, he will reveal his true self to her. He will encourage her to see beyond the mask to the man beneath.
If all your interactions are superficial and he is not really opening up or displaying vulnerability, he may not be seriously committed to you.
However, don't mistake a man who is serious about you for one who is all emotions and insecurities. This man might be a mess and seek a crutch to lean on when he gets together, which means he is wasting his time.
You know that something is wrong with your relationship, but you don't want to acknowledge it because you don't want to start with someone new all over again. You're already in this, so you're trying to make things work and find out for yourself, even if that means wasting some of your precious time!
Being silent in a relationship is often a sign that something is amiss, but not always. For example, two people who are long-married and content with their silence are comfortable being silent together. However, if a relationship is deteriorating, each person may be initially confronted with the other's silence as an arid, loveless environment. 
Even if there is good chemistry, a relationship won't continue unless the two people involved share the fundamentals of life and love. And you might be wasting your time if your relationship isn't working. In order for a relationship to last over time, it helps if the two people involved have similar views on what is and is not necessary in life. This is not to imply that love cannot exist between people from different cultural or religious backgrounds.
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