Parents should stop bringing children into this world just to suffer! Of course, that is my first statement in this article. Think of a family whereby both parents can not be in the same room without conflict taking place. How do you think the children feel? What effect do you think it has on them? Broken homes are the major factors that leads to depression, stealing, suicide, irresponsibility, addiction and many more.
Now, how does a broken home contribute to all these? Stay with me and keep glancing through as we uncover an already known truth.
· Depression: Any victim of a broken home easily falls into depression. Being it the mother, father, or child\children as the case may be. But most times, it is common with the child\children. If a child grows up in a home whereby the noise is never silent, the beatings are constantly witnessed, the parents never produce any happy moment either for themselves or the family, the difference between them and other families are always clear, no time together, nobody wants to hear anybody out, everything is just so noisy and yet so silent inside…alone…empty…it leads to depression. When you feel lonely even with people around you, then that is a sign of depression. You just feel empty inside, nothing gives you joy or a reason to be happy.
· Stealing: Simply put, they do it for survival. Most children who steal, steal not because they don’t have parents, but because they don’t have parents who actually saw or see their need as a necessity which needs to be catered for. Most broken homes, especially in Africa today, and Nigeria to be precise, when both Parents divorce, they try to place all the responsibility on one parent. But then, that parent tries to do the same…like a damn game but its not. It’s not a game. Trying to prove a point to each other while your children suffer is not a game, it is punishment. You are indirectly punishing those children or that child. That divorce is supposed to be between the both of you. Children shouldn’t be affected by the divorce of their parents. Believe me when I tell you this, they didn’t ask to be given birth to by you. You brought them into this world, take care of them and reduce the rate of stealing in the society.
· Suicide: Now this one is like the most common and most tragic outcome of a broken home. Imagine a nine-year-old kid whose parents are divorced and he or she isn’t been catered for…no attention, no love, no material things, hunger, and all that. What comes next? “What if I end my life and just put an end to all of these sufferings? Maybe if I die, my parents would cry and realise how much they actually love me. Maybe that would bring them back together”. Have you ever thought that this could be the thought of that child you both are neglecting? The truth is, most divorced couple take it out on their children or child. The anger and bitterness that follows after the divorce is being taken out on the children or child by the parent and it ought not to be so. Children are dying…taking their lives because they lack parental love and care. Parents, you better stop!
· Irresponsibility: Children learn a whole lot from their parents. Parents are the number one role models to their children. So, what happens when that son of yours watches you hit your wife or say inappropriate words to her? If he is the kind that always copies his father, of course he will grow up to do the same thing and by then you would not as a father have the right to say he is cursed because you raised him to be like that. Good morals and standards start from the home. If the home is faulty, the child is faulty unless he or she grows in the right circle with the right influence.
· Addiction: This one is a top agent of broken homes. Addiction takes place when it is used to replace something. It is a replacement. It is a pleasurable replacement. It is used to exchange something that is lacking. If a child lacks parental love or attention and finds out that he or she gets that good feeling from smoking, watching porn, or taking drugs, then why not? Of course, it makes he or she feel better so…mom and dad are not there anyway. “Anytime I think of my family or my home, I get sad and I cry because I feel like we would have been better just like my friend’s family. But when I start to do that thing I’m addicted to I forget about all my worries because it just makes me feel good”. That is it. I am doing nothing but dishing the truth to you. That is how that child feels. That is what he or she thinks about. If you fail to give them attention as parents because you cannot hold together a home, they will find one themselves.
I am not a fan of divorce. I am not a fan of an unhappy marriage either. If you both are not compactable, it won’t work. You will just end up stealing each other’s happiness. Kindly walk away silently and smoothly and still take care of your children the way you ought to. Children should not be victims of divorce. Divorce happens even though it ought not to be, but when the divorce brings about these things, it becomes the definition of a broken home. And broken homes affect the society. There can still be peace dear divorced parents, you can still make your children feel loved and avoid the disaster.
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